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Laugh page

Q: How do you get a semi-professional magician off your porch?

A: Pay him for the pizza

Q: How do you get a magician to do 100 card tricks?

A: Ask him to show you one.

“Shhaaayyy, buddy, what’s a ‘Breathalyzer’?” Asked one drunk to his friend at the next bar stool. “Well it’s a bag that tells you when you’ve drunk way too much!”. “Ah hell, whaddya know, I’ve been married to one of those for years!”